Have you ever prayed for something so intently that your heart burned? Have you ever fallen to your knees, in desperation, seeking guidance and peace, explicitly asking for a gift you felt was impossible? I did, and the outcome was my son, Jordan.
Whether your children arrive as expected, you raise your families’ children, you have step-kids, neighbor kids, you adopt, or the stork drops them off – every child is meant to be with you.
The adoption came to us, unexpectedly, after I said a silent prayer. I pleaded to have my desire for a son taken away, or to ‘please drop off a little boy between the ages of zero to three’ on our front porch. When I closed my prayer, I knew I was supposed to tell one friend. A few years later, after I had given away everything baby, this same friend, Jared, told us about Jordan.
Without going into too much detail, which is all on my blog, our whole life flipped upside down, and it was supposed to. This little man came into our lives like a storm! He is passionate, determined, entrepreneurial, funny and he still loves snuggling with his “mama” which I will always be grateful for.
For years, I have tried to help him be confident at night when he feels scared. I have taught him how to treat ladies, and he has had A LOT of practice. I want him to feel loved and supported. All of this work is producing exactly what I’ve wanted, but now I’m seeing him transition into a young man. He will be twelve in February, and although I want to hold him close forever, just like my six daughters, I know this is impossible.
I feel like cheering and crying at the same time. I am proud and tired. How can everything I’ve worked for be walking out the door with Jordan in six years? I have parented since I was twenty, making this my quarter-century mark!
I am a good mother, and I am not perfect. I am an older kid, who is simply trying to be the best mom I can be. The hardest part of parenting is giving it everything you have 24/7, and then letting go so your kids can fly. I will do this, I have before, but it really does hurt.
Friends, hold your little ones. The things that drive you crazy about them now are the exact things that will make them wonderful adults!
Happy National Sons Day! I feel very blessed to raise a boy who is loved by so many. His birth family, current family, and extended family would not be the same without him.