It’s a wonderful, interesting, world.
I entered this realm one day, in my laundry room where a lot of things hit me. Most of the time, it’s clothes being thrown down the laundry shoot into our trough (literally it’s a cows trough), when I’m leaning over to sort it, but sometimes it’s profound. On this fateful day, I had a feeling to start writing. Where? I asked myself. Where would I start writing? I have always enjoyed my journal, but learned long ago, that if I were to put anything into writing, whether seemingly private or not, someone (namely my brothers) would eventually read it. I learned to sensor myself, even in high school when writing about my “first love” and many teenage escapades that I didn’t deem quite public information. I hid my journal, between my mattress, only to find out several years later that each page was being devoured for sneaky entertainment of some un-named (uh hem…DAVE).
Anyway, I decided to write.
At first it was thoughts on scrap pieces of papers and in my “personal” journals, but one day my sister in law Heather was over at my house, and talked me into writing on a blog. I had no idea what it was, or how to navigate one – but I just started. It was so fun for me to pull random pictures that I loved, to share with family. And then one day, I learned about stats. How fun to try and track how many people were reading my blog? I had never assumed that anyone would read it, other than possibly a few family members that complain that I never answer my phone enough.
The first time I received a comment, I was thrilled! There WERE actually people reading my words for whatever reason, how fun! How social! I wasn’t all alone being a mommy of many any more, I had friends, even though I didn’t have time to actually see anyone! The world of social media became a drug unto me. I loved it. Soon, people I didn’t even know were commenting on my blog posts, and I was kind of confused, but I didn’t care….MORE FRIENDS! I was having so much fun. Writing was a way to share all of my random thoughts, because sometimes I feel like I will burst with them, you know?
I watched my numbers gradually climb, and then Handsome came. He was beautiful, and my words about him came from my soul somewhere deep. I love writing about things I am passionate about, because words flow. I love telling stories, because I find emotion in them…life. Happy, sad, angry, funny, impossible; it’s what we are all about. It’s why we are here. And gradually, I found the power of writing, and sharing hard thoughts and the impact they can have on people, but none more than myself. My words have gradually transformed my thoughts over the years and I have gotten to know ME, and in a way, they have helped me find my path. We are all on a path, and we are here on earth to do something. The beauty is, that we get to pick. We get to decide each day as we wake, what we want to be that day.
Today I am at a place where I have stopped watching the numbers so much. I have been writing less lately, because getting healthy has to be first priority right now. When I have an extra hour, I run instead of write. Part of me is worried that I will lose momentum with my blog, that somehow people will leave because I’m not as consistent, but I can’t worry about that. Ultimately, this blog is a record of my journey, not for entertainment…although I love to do that as well.
I am seeing my future more clearly than ever before, now that I have energy and I’m starting to feel much better. I am really excited about my photography classes, and sharing that with you. I ran 6 miles today WITHOUT STOPPING, which is HUGELY ENORMOUS for me. As I run, I think of all the things I want to write about. I think about short phrases, that have power for me (I also think about how funny I must look with big boes headphones on, and ugly spandex on my uncomfortable butt, and potholes, and how I would take a guy out if he attacked me, (with a rock) and nononononono I need to stop!!!) but sometimes I get inspiration.
Today, these were my thoughts.
Glory isn’t found only on race day, but in the persistent miles of preparation.
We are all preparing everyday, for something in the future. Or, we are just thinking about what we would like to do in the future, but not persistently preparing. I have done both. The hardest part for me, by far, is getting myself to run those miles when it isn’t exciting, but that is where the real power comes from.
I challenge you, and myself, to keep preparing each day. Don’t wait for something big to happen (like your 20 year reunion CRAP) to get back into shape, or work for any goal…. do it now, and you will find power in doing something – even if it is really small – because it was more than yesterday. I hope you are having a great weekend! I’ll be heading off to Connecticut most of next week, to meet amazing people involved with “Help me Grow” national. I couldn’t be more thrilled!