I woke up feeling pretty great today, which has been a rarity lately. Maybe it’s the LOVE in the air. The kids are excited, and full of candy. Dreaming of their Valentine secret crushes… I also feel like I am crazing a lot less food…which turns out to be a good thing! I think all that estrogen makes me love Ben and Jerry a little too much.
True to Jon’s nature, he surprised me AGAIN. I swear, I will never make it all up to that guy. He is so thoughtful and has great taste. When he is in doubt, he asks a girl that he knows that I agree with their taste, and conjures up something wonderful.
This was my something wonderful today:
See what I mean?
Love ya Mr. Moss.
On a total side note….
It seems to me, that we have Pink Moss blog mid-life crisis on our hands.
Don’t get me wrong, I love blogging AND have probably stuck with it consistently more than anything else in my life, other than my kids and husband, …. and ipod.
But here is the thing. I am wanting more out of this relationship between you and myself. It is so one sided, and I am just not good with long distance relationships. Just ask Jon. If Jon has to go out of town for the weekend for business (which doesn’t happen often at all), I feel fine for the first few days. I feel free, like there is no pressure to watch the news with him, because it gives me nightmares.
Last night someone on the news mentioned something about the horrible economy, and I replayed it over and over in my head as I fell asleep. I dreamed that Jon and I were getting an award for business development somewhere, and as I was sitting in the audience before I went on stage, I heard people talking. There were families all around me whispering “Did you hear about the company I work for?” he said, “They laid off 30 people last week.” and another lady saying, “Why are were here recognizing business owners? They make life miserable for all of us! I hate my job!”
and I became really pretty defensive, and turned to them and said, “Do you have ANY idea what kind of stress goes into running a business and keeping people employed in this economy? How do you think it feels to be the one having to fire a dad from the only source of income he has to feed his hungry children at home? The banks won’t lend money for growth, so even though our business is growing it’s hard to fund everything that it takes to be successful! My house has been on the line for years, and we are subject to our clients that have been cutting work hours on us…BECAUSE of the economy!”
I obviously have some pent up issues surrounding business and feeling defensive, but that is another blog post. Anyway, I make it fun for the first few days if Jon has to leave and call it a “girls day” which worked until Jordan came to live with us. And then, I feel a bit tired and tattered and worn out, and I start thinking of all the fun stuff Jon must be doing wherever he might be at the time. And I begin to feel alone.
Well, people. Ladies. (I am assuming ladies because blogger tells me that most of you are between the ages of 25-45 and have had “some” college, like myself) I have been having a one sided conversation here on this blog since 2009, I believe. I am starting to feel a bit full of myself. I am sick of hearing only my thoughts and stories.
So, I am calling for a change. I have been thinking a lot about what that change will be. Part of me says, start a separate blog where I spend more time writing my posts….Pink Moss is just whatever random thoughts I may be having that day, and if I want to really take my writing serious…it needs to be treated that way. Not serious like every post is serious, but like focusing on writing a post that is good.
But then, I feel like there is still a place for Pink Moss and the ongoings of our family in general. I love keeping a record of pictures and trips, and random thoughts. But, I worry if I am trying to juggle two blogs, that I won’t have enough time for either one of them to make either one worth reading. But then I think, I write to enjoy, and if someone wants to read it…than that is fine, but not my driving force.
For awhile now, I have wanted to find a way to make Pink Moss more of a group feeling, a women’s club if you will. Not the kind you have in elementary with a secret password, and not everyone is invited kind of club…but one that women can come together and bond without cattiness and judgement. One where we don’t look sideways at each other in judgment, but where we stand by each other and press forward.
We are all in “this” together, whatever “this” is.
I would LOVE to combine my love for nonprofit work and my blog, if at all possible. I would LOVE to have a place where we can all talk together, NOT just me. I love it during the holidays when there have been some bloggers try and make a kind of giving community. But, I’m thinking, why does it have to be just during the holidays? Why can’t “Pink Moss” or my new blog be a place where people can give all year? I have been thinking that my facebook page is a great place to do this…where we can ALL talk and share stories with each other. Where we can post a need, and someone else in our “club” can try and fill it. For example…
Mrs. Jones says, “I really need some gently used size 2 boys clothes…”
and Mrs. Smith replies, “My son just grew out of his, what is your address and I’ll send them your way!”
Mrs. Jones says, “My grandson just found out he is very sick…”
and we all join in and say… “Let us pray for him!”
I say, “I really hate cooking, does anyone have a healthy, yummy dinner idea?”
and you say, “SURE! order pizza!” or really give me some kind of recipe that you think I can follow.
Got it? But I am still trying to figure out the details, so hold on…but plan on making friends! We all need them, even if they live a thousand miles away! I’m thinking that our mascot needs to by a bison. Why you ask? Here are some reasons I’m thinking bison. Why? Because I have always liked them.
This doesn’t sound all to different from the mom’s I see at the park sitting and talking together, or thatfact that we all go to the bathroom in herds.
“Wallowing is a common behavior of bison. A bison wallow is a shallow depression in the soil, either wet or dry. Bison roll in these depressions, covering themselves with mud or dust.”
This sounds completely like us women to me! We are so good at wallowing in the mud. We pay attention to our weaknesses and not our strengths, and bison’s are strong!
“The bison’s temperament is often unpredictable. They usually appear peaceful, unconcerned, even lazy, yet they may attack anything, often without warning or apparent reason.”
I don’t have to make the connection for you here…
“Bison are large herd animals that defend their young vigorously.”
SEE! We are strong, and unpredictable and we travel in herds. We gain protection from joining in herds. We all need this as mothers. We live separate in our own little worlds, but we are doing the same things day in and day out. We need to come together!
And lastly, to make my bison case (almost same as buffalo), the Native American Indians learned to use every bit of them to survive. Not to say that the Indian’s will kill us, but as bison, we are complete with everything we need to make this motherhood/womanhood thing work. Our shelter, food, support, etc, are all wrapped up inside of us in the way of love. We can support each other, and we are enough!
ok, a bit of a ramble….but, now I am trying to think of a name for our new group! It could either say bison or buffalo in the name… Kind of like a sports name, but for us! You will be part of it, and I will be part of it. And together we can help each other! I can’t wait!
comment with any or all ideas!
(a flag would be fun! Or even a shirt!)
If you are just ready to run away because I am crazy for wanting a bison club, just blame it on my rapidly fluctuating hormones.