I share the following story only because my sister teased me into it. I actually forgot about this little incident until she brought it up a few days ago. I also thought it would be great for my “Flashback Friday” post.
I am world renowned for my selective memory skills. All unpleasant experiences get attention while I am dealing with them, but after a certain point when I can’t do anything or help the problem anyway
I tuck it away
in a special place in my brain that holds discarded memories.
This story was one of them. She helped me drag it out of the dusty corner of my mind and renewed it like an old rusty bike that has been resurrected to ride once again. She oiled the chains and details.
For those of you that don’t know what Edelweiss is, it’s a show tune sung in the musical “The Sound of Music” by Mr. Von Trapp. It is a gorgeous song he sings to bid farewell to Austria, a country he loved. He has a deep rich voice and he sounds like butta’ *butter with my accent* It was written by the famous Rodgers and Hammerstein, actually the last song they wrote together.
Maybe that’s because they knew that eventually a girl “Yours Truly” would hack it up in a college choir tryout and disgrace their name forever.
I didn’t do it for me, I did it for her. Her = My college roommate Kori. I loved her and I would do anything for her and proved it in this one act alone. She was an extraordinarily fabulous over*the*top great singer. This should have been enough to build confidence combined with the fact that she had been in choir groups her whole life.
But it wasn’t.
Actually the more I think about it, I believe she wasn’t nervous at all…she just wanted someone to try out with her *that would make her sound* better so she would make it. It reminds me of the joke about bringing a slower runner with you so they are the one eaten by the bear *Kind of like that*. She knew I stunk, stunk to high heaven. Now, I can carry a tune while singing to the radio or in church with a congregation around masking my imperfections, but I am not a soloist by any means.
My first mistake was picking Edelweiss. It is a song that is miserable for even a great vocalist to sing unless they have practiced extensively. I just picked it because I had heard it.
I had A DAY to practice.
My sister was there with Kori and I picking out the sheet music. I just have to wonder why neither of them warned me of the depth of my inadequacy. It makes it even better noting that Camille is also a very talented singer. Now if they would have asked me to dance, I could have pulled it off.
I vaguely remember them calling my name and walking up to the stage in the dark auditorium in front of all the judges. After that, I don’t recall other than my voice cracked and wobbled like an old lady. I don’t vibrato but I did on this special day because I was so nervous. I can only imagine what Simon Cowell would have said if he was the one in front.
Needless to say, I didn’t make it and Camille and Kori had a great laugh. The funny thing is that I knew I stunk but didn’t care. I didn’t plan on making it, so I didn’t feel bad when I didn’t but it still makes me laugh that my self esteem can handle that kind of abuse and stay intact. I guess that’s how I deal with the things I can’t change. I’d rather laugh than cry any day!