Just wanted to let you know that I have posted my first letters on mynew site! The letters are great and very insightful. Head on over and check them out if you haven’t! Also, if you read one of their posts and find it to resonate with you somehow, go ahead and leave a comment or visit their site and tell them where you came from. I want to get great advertising going for the great people that help out my cause. Thanks!
I pre-apologize for lumping my mention with my next post, and if you are faint of heart or easily grossed out, this may not be the place for you today. You see, I just finished taking our three bunnies *Theo, Floppy, and Suki* to my kids school. As you can imagine it was quite the ordeal. Loading them into the car with all five kids was nothing less than hectic.
Backpacks – check
Home Lunch – check
Homework – check
Hair done – check
Bunnies – check
Bunny Food – check
We were set! We raced off to Krispy Kreme donuts because Kinley was having an end of year school party. This means of course, that ALL of the kids need to bring donuts. As we pulled into the drive through *very convenient*, Kinley looked down and screamed!
“EWWW, Bunny pee!”
That’s right, it had leaked right through the cardboard box and all over her pants.
“MOM, it’s kind of thick like an egg!”
Ok Bleck! I had a flashback of Easter morning when one of the bunnies peed in the box before we gave it to the kids and I told them it was an egg yolk to keep the surprise. Yes, yuck. We proceeded to order six dozen donuts and drove back to our house. Kinley ran in and changed, and realized Halle didn’t have any shoes.
Phew! That was close.
Off to the school we drove to share the bunny love with the school. You see, my kids go to a small private school and I have FIVE that attend. So we basically brought the whole school to a halt when we walked around and showed all of them our little furry friends. After every class, I asked the kids to wash their hands because I was scared of setting off a major bunny allergy epidemic.
By the time we were through, we had made a lot of little kids happy, left saw chips from the cage all over the school, and only had one kid break out in hives. (I dare say he may not be the only one.) Cross your fingers that I don’t receive any hate calls from mad mommies today!
After reflecting on the morning I realized something.
I LOVE bunny poop.
It is perfectly round, hard, and easy to clean up. Comparing that to the clogged toilet I found when I came back from the school, these easy to clean up, orb like poops made me smile. How precious and what a blessing after having so many other things to clean up! NOTHING procures obscenities faster from my mouth than an overflowing toilet. Nothing. I am now reminded of a calender my brother and sister in law so graciously gave Jon and I for Christmas one year. Let me share a bit with you.
Monthy Doos
For those interested in purchasing the calender
Yes, yes, I know completely nasty, but oh so funny. If you are not laughing, well I am sorry. One mans trash is another man’s treasure. Parents have to deal with a lot of crap, no pun intended. Some is mighty large crappy days… and some are “doo”able crappy days. But the truth is, we all go through them.
So I want to give a shout out for baby sized crappy days that are manageable.
I want to leave you with the words from a book we got for a white elephant gift once (I never realized how lucky with the gifts we have been until now! I guess people think Jon has everything, so they have to be creative and a bit gross!)
Ghost Poopie: The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.
Clean Poopie: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Wet Poopie: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won’t ruin them with a stain.
Second Wave Poopie: This happens when you’re done poopieing and you’ve pulled yo ur pants up to your knees and you realize that you have to poopie some more.
Pop A Vein In Your Forehead Poopie:The kind where you strain so much to get it out you practically have a stroke.
Lincoln Log Poopie: The kind of poopie that is so huge that you’re afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
Gassey Poopie: It’s so noisy that everyone within earshot is giggling.
Drinker Poopie: The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. Its most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
Corn Poopie: Self explanatory.
Gee I Wish I Could Poopie Poopie: The kind where you want to poopie but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
Spinal Tap Poopie: That’s where it hurts so badly coming out you’d swear it was leaving you sideways.
Wet Cheeks Poopie (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out of your butt so fast , your cheeks get splashed with water.
Liquid Poopie: The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt and splashed all over the toilet bowl.
Mexican Food Poopie: It smells so bad your nose hurts.
Upper Class Poopie: The kind of poopie that does not smell.
Surprise Poopie: You’re not even at the toilet because you are sure you’re about to fart, but OOPS…A Poopie.
Dangling Poopie: The poopie refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done poopie-ing. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose.
Also, while researching poopies today, I came across a book sold at Amazon called, “What’s Your Poop Telling You” and although it sounds sick, it was actually funny and very informative, so if you are looking for a light read click on the link and you can actually read it online if you are not already totally sicked out!
Where do I get that calendar?!?!? Not only do I need one in my house, I know several people who would get a kick out of it!
You know, I feel something of a poop expert after having my kid, but most of those I had never heard of!
Following from mom loop
The poop list is totally hilarious!
visiting from the mom loop!
What a fun post! Stopping from Mom Loop to follow.
Oh my goodness! The poop calendar was almost too much for me but I am sitting here literally laughing out loud at the poopie list….like hysterical laughing LOL!
hilarious.. i think your writing is hilarious. i love your blog. im following from blogfrog mom loop